Monday, November 30, 2015

Non of my business

This is really non of my business but... I just find a need to speak my feelings out...
I been wondering... But... Aren't you making yourself a bit to...... cheap? Sorry but I can't think of a better word for it, its quite offensive Ik... Not intentionally...
I won't deny nor judge your feelings for him and I am absolutely not sure how he feels about you either. Your are more of the "friends for benefits" than the "test and run" statues now...
Are you really thinking its okay to keep this up?
If that first night was a mistake than let bygones be bygones, but if anymore... I find that you have not been seeing into the mirror for a very long time to see what you have become...
Yes... I have no rights to judge... But a person's characteristics and personality can be seen through their actions...
What your doing now... There is no other words to signify it... The most positive word I can think of now is "confusion"
Its becoming a toxic to you... You can't make up the decision to confess (ask him to be your boyfriend) or push him away... Now your really left hanging there and he is not making things clear to you...
Are you really okay with it being like this...
Yes... You can probably say that "its non of your business", but worrying for you as a accomplice...as a human...
First time to like someone so much for you I guess?:). To be willing to sacrifice so much for that person... But if your gonna lose yourself in the process than you need to wake up...
You are a brave girl, I always believe in that... In love... There is no waiting... Cause once the chance is gone... Its gone... Though 小幸运 is just a movie, but thats what it is trying to express out...
Confess or break the chain... Its up to you... If your gonna keep on with what your doing now... I guess you should avoid bringing emotions in... So that it will be less painful for you...

To love someone it takes courage to go for it... the courage to confess, if not... from the start both of your are still not ready yet...

Just saying out my thoughts here. Ik she doesn't read anymore so its okay.:)
But if you do read the blog... I meant no harm... Like I say I will watch over you...
Hoping that you will be couragous enough to grab hold of your happiness...

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

A sudden message from you...

My heart skipped a beat when seeing your message... This mix up feeling of happiness and sadness.
We had quite a talk today, I try not to make it awkward by starting a topic which you will be able to speak without conservations, which is your new love...
And in the end... I realise I still love you...
Still keeping all the memories we had, the photos, the chocolate you gave me for birthday present, the crayon shin chan lego, and the most importantly... The ring...
Its not that it doesn't tear me apart, but I am just holding in the pain... The pain that has been with me for this 5 months... To the point its become a natural feeling for me...
I really hope he will bring you happiness, maybe your previous ex was not the destined one... But I hope this time its him... I hate to see you being sad, frighten, and tearing... Cause ik I no longer have the rights nor ability to be your happiness... Its up to them...
No matter what just remember... I will always be you guardian angel... No matter what you did to hurt me, I will still love you... I am just that kind of silly guy...
You know where to find me if you need me... Don't hold back...:)